Growth is a process of constantly leaving regrets behind.

Recently, worries have been piling up: I stayed up too late yesterday, failed to wake up early, was late for a gathering and dozed off; I used my phone too much, resulting in overdue data charges, and couldn’t top up when my phone was suspended; the first half of my flight back to Chengde was cancelled, and only after communicating did I realize I hadn’t booked a direct flight and had to pay a cancellation fee; I rushed onto a bus at the stop only to find it was going in the wrong direction, and when I got off, my bus card was again overdrawn; I arrived in Yuhang District only to learn there was a rehearsal today, so I had to temporarily switch roles and fill in; my teammates had already figured out the longitude and latitude, but because Google Maps was inaccurate, we ended up taking a big detour with a large group of people; I just missed the last bus after getting off the subway, and when I rode a shared bike back to my doorstep, I found all the docking stations were full and I had to go further… No one probably wants to hear me complain, but listing it all out, I realize I’m quite unlucky (

Walking home by the riverside, I calmly reflected on all this, and felt the weight of the word “growth.” I always want to kill two birds with one stone, but I’m also a bit forgetful, often putting in twice the effort for half the result and disappointing others; yet, these facts haven’t taught me humility, but instead fueled my vanity, longing for others’ approval and praise. Can such a person as I truly respond to others’ expectations and help them? Yesterday, I finished playing through “Finding Paradise.” Although it’s not as famous as its predecessor “To the Moon,” I felt a deeper resonance and shed tears. I won’t spoil it here, but I hope friends who read this short essay can truly experience the protagonist’s life full of regrets and losses. I don’t have a Faye by my side, but I am surrounded by people who love me, and there are those gazes and sighs from heaven.

Suddenly, I remembered saying to someone, “No matter how busy you are, don’t forget to look up at the stars.” Looking up, the sky over Hangzhou today was exceptionally clear in the chilly air, with the sharp eye of Sirius and the heroic posture of Orion faintly discernible. When the moonlight dims, the starlight becomes clearer; perhaps, we don’t always have to shine.

After all, it’s those regrets that have made me who I am today.