Hangzhou

…Wait, what date is it today? (Finished writing on July 9.) “At the start of the start, September brought us to the classroom; “At the end of the end, July carried us apart; “The days that once were once remain vivid before our eyes; “The regret of regrets is that we cannot return…” In the blink of an eye, four years have passed since middle-school graduation. During those years I moved back and forth, inside China and abroad, and missed several visits my classmates organized to our old school. Still, I have been fortunate: many friends remained in touch. Even after everyone entered university, old friends could reunite; when I invited them to visit our teachers, they came gladly. (One person could not make it because of his own schedule, but believe me, we carried your share into the meeting too. Somehow xxy’s name kept appearing in conversation. Any clues, gentlemen?) ...

Good night, Boring Notes. It has actually been a very long time since I wrote anything on paper. A physical work can reach only so many readers, and preserving it creates problems of its own. While packing for my departure, I happened across these notebooks. So I read them. It was an evening neither moonless nor especially windy. We were still in middle school. After one week of military training, the school extended the arrangement into a full month of “military-style management + study.” That was probably my first evening self-study, though not my first self-study session. After elementary school, I often ran with a classmate to Hangzhou No. 14 High School beside Wawayu Primary School, where we would finish our homework together. We wanted to complete it as quickly as possible and spend the remaining time roaming the high-school campus, so I developed formidable homework-speedrunning skills. (As for that classmate… we were still chatting a few days ago.) ...

After riding the metro in Beijing and Shanghai, I remain convinced that Hangzhou’s is the best and most comfortable. Because Beijing is the capital, its metro system spans an enormous range of eras. Many so-called “same-station transfers” are really old and new stations stitched together. The trains themselves are blind boxes too: old and new mixed at random. ...

Today, I have finally graduated in the truest sense of the word! No need to lament the rapid passage of time, nor to regret past failures. Here, please allow me to briefly tell the story of a youth who entered high school with impure motives but was ultimately transformed by grace (the following is the draft of the graduation speech, with minor edits). To be perfectly blunt, I left public education mostly because the pressure was too great—not out of some noble desire to pioneer Christian education in China. Countless times I have wondered what my life might look like now if I had stayed in the public system and taken that broad road. At the risk of sounding immodest, I learn quickly; perhaps my grades there would have been better than they are today. Once, while I was entertaining that very thought, Mr. Zhang said beside me, “Modern education can indeed produce a top scorer—but that top scorer may end up taking their own life.” Ah, we human beings are like that. We endlessly romanticize what we could not have, then forget to cherish and give thanks for what we did receive. ...

A busy, bustling day. For once, I finally managed to wake up early, then immediately set about packing. I stuffed everything into my checked suitcase as if solving the densest packing of cubes and successfully held it below twenty kilograms. That, too, is a technical skill. After lunch, I was busy rushing to catch the train and then the flight. It felt like most of the day was spent on transit. Since there was no Wi-Fi on the plane, I used this time to quickly draft something—tomorrow’s speech draft! Ah, as expected of me, efficiency is always at its peak right before the deadline! ...

My pigeon-like instinct to procrastinate ultimately cost me the chance to finish entry 24 in 2024. At least number 25 is guaranteed to come out in 2025. Regarding yesterday’s (hard-earned) rambling account, some people might find it suddenly unfamiliar. To this, I can only say that my mom is the same (scribble) and a year ago, I wouldn’t have understood any of this either. Most of what I wrote are the changes and insights of the year, and the former Tianyao remains unchanged! Thanks for understanding. ...

…Alright, so many people actually read my ramblings. Suddenly I feel motivated to keep writing. Another year has passed in the blink of an eye. The last New Year’s Eve still feels vivid (okay, not really). On this occasion of bidding farewell to the old and welcoming the new, I wish everyone… oops, wrong words. 2024 was a special year. Throughout the year, some people around me were busy, others passed silently. And I, seemingly stagnant (and indeed half a year behind schedule), am still striving. Outside of school, I learned more. ...

Some pre-entry rambling: yesterday’s post was supposed to be visible to me only, then made public a few days later. My finger slipped and published it, and I decided, eh, leave it—hardly anyone will see it anyway ( After playing soccer, I went to Teacher Figo’s house for dinner. On the way, we talked a lot about the future, about school, work, and time management. So, I finally started to think: How should I spend the possibly relatively free year ahead? ...

Growing up is a process of leaving regret after regret behind. Recently, worries have been piling up: I stayed up too late yesterday, failed to wake up early, was late for a gathering and dozed off; I used my phone too much, resulting in overdue data charges, and couldn’t top up when my phone was suspended; the first half of my flight back to Chengde was cancelled, and only after communicating did I realize I hadn’t booked a direct flight and had to pay a cancellation fee; I rushed onto a bus at the stop only to find it was going in the wrong direction, and when I got off, my bus card was again overdrawn; I arrived in Yuhang District only to learn there was a rehearsal today, so I had to temporarily switch roles and fill in; my teammates had already figured out the longitude and latitude, but because Google Maps was inaccurate, we ended up taking a big detour with a large group of people; I just missed the last bus after getting off the subway, and when I rode a shared bike back to my doorstep, I found all the docking stations were full and I had to go further… No one probably wants to hear me complain, but listing it all out, I realize I’m quite unlucky ( ...

I left a little of the disappearing act intact, so you would still know this was written by Zhuge Tianyao. (Because yes, I am filling it in on the 23rd.) My first impression of Zhejiang University was big. My second was “it has everything.” Unlike every other university I had visited, this one required a bicycle instead of walking (otherwise I would never have finished seeing it). As my resident “local” explained what building after building was for, one thought burst into my head: “All of this is only one campus?” Universities really cannot be judged by the same scale. ...